The Simple Act Of Connection
Unspoken Words
By Bill Curran
Copyright © 2018 All Rights reserved
In the course of my lifetime, I have experienced many accidents, illnesses, losses and other misfortunes, and I have been amazed by the heartfelt support and encouragement I have received from friends, relatives, and even total strangers. Some examples of this encouragement have been in the form of letters, phone calls, emails, flowers and other gifts, to mention a few.
However, I have also been surprised at some people whom I considered "close" who chose not to contact me during some of my most demanding life situations.
In thinking more about this lately, I can only say that I have developed a deeper understanding and forgiveness about this lack of contact on some peoples part; I have realized that there are many people who just don't know what to say in difficult situations, and are fearful of having "awkward" conversations about a challenging health condition, the possible loss of a dear one, a serious illness, or other calamities that frequently befall our lives.
I no longer take these excuses of people to address real life challenges of other people personally; I completely understand why this kind of silence occurs; we already have so many challenges in our life, why add the challenges of other people to contend with? What do I say? What can I do that will make a difference?
I think it's important to note that, in today's extremely complex technological society, we have many more options than we had previously. We no longer need to personally "confront" the person who is in need of some consolation directly; we can send information, articles, links, get-well wishes, consolations and condolences, and other forms of sympathy or support via such methods as email, snail mail, text messaging, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and other message formats, and still achieve remarkable results.
If you, yourself, have never been in similar challenging circumstances, you may not understand how much these small points of contact actually mean to a person undergoing difficult times. They are not just messages of support and empathy, but wonderful vibrations that you are sending, telling the person in distress that you are thinking of them in a kind way, and wishing them the very best outcome to their challenge. People are much more affected by this simple gesture than you would imagine; to many, it brings support, consolation, connection and encouragement to a situation that may be extremely burdensome or problematic.
You do NOT have to try to solve their problems; you only need to offer empathy, compassion and support, not intervention. You also do not have to create lengthy conversations; your message can be as short as an emoji photo or image that will bring a smile to the other person. This simple act of connection reminds the recipient that they are on your mind and that you care about their well being; this can be a true elixir to those who are on the verge of giving up their struggle, but only need a small message of encouragement to carry on.
When I, myself, have experienced difficult circumstances, I have completely relished a timely emoji or picture; this kindness has elevated my mood, reminded me of my friends, and has supplied the support I needed at a crucial time; even the simplest form of correspondence has done wonders for my mental attitude for that day. It signals to me that I am important enough to receive a positive message of connection from that person; I also do the same, sending something as simple as an image of a heart or happy face to someone who may need some reminder that I care about their situation, am just thinking of them, and wishing them well. The positive message of support comes across even without any words; this simple act is enough.
So, I encourage those of you who have been reluctant to contact those in troublesome situations because you don't know what to say; say it electronically, if you need to, but at least take the time to make contact with that other person who may need some cheering up or consolation; it will mean a lot to them and will certainly improve their mood, and, at least temporarily, take their mind off of their situation. Your thoughtfulness makes more of a difference than you realize, and incidentally, it also benefits you to express your compassion.
I welcome your comments on this subject, as I believe we can all contribute, to improving the health and well being for those for whom we care in even the simplest of ways, no matter how difficult their situation may be.
Namaste'
Copyright © 2018 Bill Curran - All Rights Reserved.
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